This blog originally started out on a mother’s blogging site. This was because, at the time, it dealt with the rather sad and finite subject of termination, or abortion as some call it. My original intentions were to write for myself (I’ve always been able to understand my thoughts more when they are in black and white in front of me) and to educate women about the effects that their unilateral decisions had on the man, the prospective father and “equal” parent in the relationship. And how important it was for the male involved to actually feel like his opinions mattered. It seems totally unfair that in the “incubation” period, men have no rights at all, yet once a child was born, they are locked in for the rest of their lives? How do Men cope with this kind of situation? From my experience, they lose all sense of self worth, they feel abused, misunderstood, and – they cry alone.
As time progressed, I slipped from my grief at losing a child into a deep depression and became a substance abuser of the highest order. My guilty releases from the pain I was experiencing soon took the form of anything I could get my hands on, but mainly Alcohol. As days turned into months without hope I slipped further towards oblivion. Then, one day recently, I chose to turn things around and try to stay sober forever. Of course, forever is a long time and therefore all I can do is take on life sober on a daily basis. It is my eternal hope that if only one person currently going through the pains of Alcoholism, or Addiction or Loss of any kind, feels strongly enough to quit after reading this blog, then it will not have been time wasted.
AKA Shelly Long