​It gives me great pleasure, not sure that’s quite the right word, to write something not about me, or her, but my beautiful daughter in Melbourne, Australia. We’ll call her Miss T. 

I say not ‘pleasure’ purely because she’s in quite a bit of trouble herself right now, but let’s start at the beginning. Back in 1992 I moved for a few years to the ‘sunburnt country with the hot red center’ with one of my favourite people on this earth. She was my ex fiance (KJ) and after a brief visit one Christmas we decided to give it a go out there. All went well for a few years until 1 night I let myself down in the most disgraceful of ways. I’d never done it before and never since.  Again drink was at the centre of one of the worst decisions of my life. A vamp of a girl had been ‘chasing’ me at work. Being a POM I stood out a bit and I was full of confidence and swagger in those days. 

I’m not going to give this woman a nice name, let’s tell it how it is. I’ll call her Lucifer. If the cap fits… She was sexy in her way, if a bit slutty. One night we all went out after work and got drunk. The next thing I know I’m in her car parked up on some local beach making out. It was the worst decision I have ever made to this very day. That one night stand, as I hoped it would be, led to possibly the only other time my life was nuked as much as recent events. Lucifer took immense joy in not telling my fiance all about it. Instead she thought it best to visit KJ’s mother at work and tell her instead. Yep, classy bitch is Lucifer..But Karma never gets the wrong address. I hear a huge Iron gate fell on her years later and from what I can tell she has been never been happy for all her scheming. 

My whole Australian residency was sponsored by KJ on a defacto relationship application. And I loved her. I still do. I always will. She is the classiest lady I’ve ever met. More about her later. So this one night stand was anything but. Lucifer made it clear she would get her man, me, any way she could. Firstly this took the shape of embarrassing KJ at work (we all worked together) and then blackmailing me with the threat of contacting the Department Of Immigration to inform them my relationship with KJ was a sham (it never was) to get me excluded from the country. Nice girl. More of that later too. 

I continued to see her fearing I’d be sent back to the dreayness of the UK and eventually she got pregnant with Miss T. The first time I was subject to any kind of restraining order was down to these events. Lucifer begrudgingly accepted I loved KJ and grew frustrated at me whilst carrying Miss T. She pushed me away and hooked up with another English guy whilst still pregnant. Really. I decided if I was to father this child then I would do my utmost to do exactly that. Lucifer knew she held all the cards now. 

The more I wanted to be involved, the more fun she had making sure I couldn’t be. She had an order made to stop me contacting her which I broke on the eve of Miss T’s birth. I called Lucifer to find out when my child was being born. She laughed and said ‘I’ve got you now’..She did, she got me good. She still does to this very day. I found out later the guy she was seeing at the time was present at my daughter’s birth. That was the first time my spirit and my heart was crushed to a pulp by an evil woman. 

Unfortunately, it was not the last..